This is better. We see the face. But I can also see she is not 'in' the picture. Next time. Walk up, talk to her. Tell her what story you want to tell. It is about here. She is in the picture but she is still not there. It is not her story. What is her story? Again there are distractions. The lady on the phone. It would have been better to isolate your subject from the surrounding. Do you want to picture things as you see them or do you want to tell a story?